In Jainism, marriage is neither 100% predestined nor 100% in your control. It is understood through the law of karma.

1. Role of karma (past causes)

• Whom you meet, family background, timing of proposals, obstacles, etc. are all influenced by past karmas.
• So the possibility and type of marriage (happy/strained, early/late, etc.) come from karmic fruition.

2. Role of present effort and choice

• Jain dharma does not say that “you are fixed to one person no matter what.”
• You still have:

- Budhhi (intelligence) to think. - Vivek (discrimination) to decide what is right. - Freedom to accept, refuse, delay, or end a relationship.

• How you behave in marriage (respect, honesty, ahimsa, self-control) creates new karma and can uplift or spoil that relationship.

So, in simple words:

> “Past karma brings you to certain situations and people; > your present choices decide what you do with them.”

3. Digambar & Shvetambar view

Both traditions:

• Accept karma as the main cause for life circumstances like marriage.
• Accept that the soul has free will within karmic limits.
• Neither teaches a rigid “soulmate” or absolute predestination idea.

Differences between them are in technical details of karma, not in the basic idea that:

• Karma influences,
• Purusharth (effort) still matters.

4. What is the Jain way to look at your marriage?

• Don’t get stuck in fear: “Is it written or not written?”
• Ask instead:

- Will this marriage help both of us live ahimsa, satya, brahmacharya (restraint), aparigraha (non‑attachment)? - Can we support each other’s spiritual growth?

• Pray (Navkar Mantra), keep your mind calm, and decide with right knowledge + right faith, not only emotion or pressure.

If you want to read more on similar questions about karma and marriage, you can see this related explanation here and here .