What you are doing reflects a very samyak (right) understanding of tapa in Jain Dharma.

Let’s break what it “means” in Jain terms.

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1. Real tapa is for nirjarā, not for name and fame

In Jainism, the true purpose of any tapa (upvās, telā, pacholā, ayambil, etc.) is:

• Nirjarā – shedding previously bound karmas
• Samvar – stopping new karmas from binding

When you keep in mind, “I am doing this for karm‑nirjarā, not for show”, your bhāv (inner intention) becomes pure. This is exactly what the scriptures call samyag tap – austerity with the right inner attitude, not mixed with pride or worldly desires.

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2. Why you avoid praise

When people praise you for your tap:

• There is a danger of mān (ego, pride) arising.
• With mān, the punya of tapa reduces, and sometimes a lot of spiritual benefit is lost.
• Also, subtle rāga (attachment to praise, “I am a big tapasvī”) can start, which again binds karma.

So, by not telling others and by requesting them not to praise you, you are trying to protect your tapa from:

• Mān (pride)
• Lobh (greed for name, status)
• Asat vedanā (sweet feeling of being special in others’ eyes)

This shows vinay (humility) and ārjava (straightness, inner honesty) in your conduct.

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3. Not telling vs. hiding from deceit

There is an important subtle point:

• If you hide your tap out of deceit (māyā) – for example, to gain more secret respect or to create a special image later – that is wrong.
• But if you remain quiet about your tap to protect your own soul from ego, that is right.

From what you described:

• You are not trying to act “small” from outside and “great” inside.
• You are genuinely afraid that prashansā (praise) may disturb your inner purity.

This is good bhāv – you are trying to save your antarmukhī (inward) state.

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4. When others still come to know

Even if you don’t tell anyone, sometimes people come to know and start praising:

• You politely stop them or divert the talk.
• This is a way of saying internally:

“Tap is not mine, it is only dharma’s greatness. I am still full of faults; I am only trying.”

This attitude:

• Reduces ego
• Strengthens kshamā, mārdav, ārjava (forgiveness, softness, straightness)
• Increases the spiritual worth of your tapa much more than the physical difficulty alone

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5. The inner meaning of what you are doing

Spiritually, what you are practicing can be described as:

1. Nishkām tapa – Tap without desire for praise, fame, or worldly benefit
2. Guptī – Control over mind, speech, and body (not announcing, not enjoying praise, not acting for show)
3. Vinay bhāv – Respecting dharma more than your own image
4. Atma‑mukhī drishti – Focusing on your own soul’s impurities, not on others’ opinion

In short, it means:

> “I want my tapa to remain a quiet inner fire that burns my karmas, > not a lamp displayed in the marketplace for people to clap at.”

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6. A small caution

One gentle warning from Jain view:

• Do not develop pride in your non‑showing also (like: “See, others show off their tap, but I am very special, I don’t”).
• Even that is a very subtle form of mān.

Constantly remember:

• “Jo kuchh hai, sab Panch Parmeshthi ka āshirvād hai;

main to abhi bhari dosh‑yukt jiv hu.” (Whatever is there is grace of the Panch Parmeshthi; I am still a soul full of faults.)

If this remembrance stays, both tap and vinay will keep growing together.

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7. In Jain language, what you are doing “means”:

• Practicing samyag tap (right austerity)
• Strengthening vinay and ārjava
• Protecting your tapa from mān and mohaniya karma
• Making your tapa more antarang (internal) than bahirang (only external)

So your approach is very much in line with the Jain ideal: Tap with humility, silence, and focus on nirjarā, not on prashansā.