Because religion, sampradaya, and culture are three different layers, and in your marriage you are seeing all three at once.

What you are feeling is common when a Digambar Jain and a Shwetambar Sthanakvasi person come together, especially with a Punjabi cultural background. The differences can feel very large because:

1. Digambar and Shwetambar follow different traditions

There are real differences in:

• murtipuja vs no-murtipuja
• temple practices
• saint/ साधु–साध्वी discipline
• scriptural traditions
• daily observances and rituals

So even though both are Jain, the external practice may look very different.

2. Sthanakvasi tradition is different from ordinary Shwetambar temple tradition

Sthanakvasi Jains generally:

• do not worship idols in temples
• focus more on upashray, sthanak, samayik, pratikraman
• emphasize simple conduct and internal purity

So if you are comparing your Digambar practice with Sthanakvasi practice, the visible overlap may seem small.

3. Punjabi culture adds another layer

Punjabi family customs, food habits, language, celebration style, and social behavior are cultural, not strictly religious. So what you may be seeing is not only Jain difference, but also a mix of:

• regional culture
• family tradition
• sampradaya practice

4. Similarity may be hidden, not absent

At the deepest level, both traditions still share core Jain values:

• Ahimsa
• Satya
• Aparigraha
• Brahmacharya / self-control
• Karma theory
• Goal of liberation
• respect for the soul and renunciation

So the similarity is often in the inner Jain philosophy, even if the outer form differs.

5. Why it feels like “no similarities”

Usually this happens when a couple focuses only on:

• ritual differences
• family expectations
• festival style
• food rules
• temple habits

Then the shared Jain foundation gets ignored.

6. Jain view on this situation

From a Jain perspective, the right approach is:

• understand differences without hatred
• respect the other tradition
• keep the core Jain principles alive
• avoid arguing over outward form
• practice compassion, restraint, and mutual respect

A marriage can work well when both partners remember: “We may not practice Jainism in the same way, but we can still live Jain values.”

In short

You are not necessarily seeing “no religion in common.” You are seeing that your sampradaya, your spouse’s sampradaya, and your cultural backgrounds are different. The common ground is there, but it is mostly in the core Jain dharma, not always in the external rituals.

If you want, I can also explain the main differences between Digambar, Shwetambar, and Sthanakvasi in a simple table.