Answer

Your discomfort is understandable. From a Jain Dharma point of view, religion should reduce ego, attachment, pride, competition, and social pressure — not increase them.

So if bidding, celebration, or Tapasya functions become a matter of:

• showing wealth,
• competing for status,
• humiliating families who cannot spend,
• pressuring people to spend beyond their means,
• or making Dharma feel like a social performance,

then that spirit is not aligned with the deeper purpose of Jain Dharma.

At the same time, the traditional explanation is that these practices were often intended as a way to support the sangh, mandir, sadhu-sadhvi vihār, religious activities, charity, and community seva. The problem begins when the inner bhāv changes from devotion to display.

Explanation

In Jain communities, practices like bidding for the 14 dreams of Bhagwan Mahavir’s mother, Janma Kalyanak ceremonies, or honoring tapasvis are usually socially accepted because people see them as:

• Lābh: an opportunity to participate in a sacred event.
• Dān: a way of giving money for religious or community purposes.
• Bhakti: expressing devotion toward Tirthankar Bhagwan.
• Prabhāvnā: creating enthusiasm for Dharma in society.
• Recognition of Tapasya: encouraging others to value self-discipline.

So, in its best form, the intention is not “buying religion.” It is supposed to be: “I am offering my wealth for Dharma, and I am receiving a ceremonial opportunity as a symbol of devotion.”

But your criticism becomes valid when it turns into: “Whoever pays the most gets the most honor.”

That can easily create ego, comparison, jealousy, and social pressure — all of which Jain Dharma asks us to reduce.

Jain View on Wealth and Display

Jain Dharma does not say wealth itself is evil. A householder may earn and use wealth responsibly. But Jain Dharma strongly emphasizes:

• Aparigraha — limiting attachment and possession.
• Vinay — humility and reverence.
• Tyāg — inner renunciation.
• Samyak bhāv — purity of intention.
• Ahimsa — not hurting others emotionally, socially, or financially.

If a religious function causes someone anxiety, debt, shame, or social humiliation, then we must honestly ask whether the form has overtaken the essence.

A Tapasya like Maskhaman is spiritually powerful because of self-control, restraint, and inner purification. Its value does not depend on how grand the parna or celebration is.

A simple parna done with humility is spiritually better than a grand event done for name, fame, or pressure.

Why Gurus May Still Be Present

This is a sensitive point.

A sadhu or sadhvi may be present at such events because the event is part of the sangh’s religious calendar, and they may use the occasion to give pravachan, bless the sangh, inspire devotion, or encourage Dharma.

But their presence does not automatically mean that every social excess around the event is spiritually ideal.

In Jain Dharma, the highest teaching always remains:

• reduce rāg-dvesh,
• reduce ego,
• reduce greed,
• reduce attachment,
• move toward self-purification.

So even if a community practice exists, it should be examined through Dharma, not blindly accepted because “everyone does it.”

About Tapasya Functions and Social Pressure

You are right to feel disturbed if families avoid Tapasya because they fear they cannot afford the celebration.

That is opposite to the Jain spirit.

Tapasya is not a social event first. It is a spiritual practice first.

If someone completes Ayambil, Attham, Athai, Maskhaman, Varshitap, or any Tapasya, the real honor is their restraint, not the decoration, hall, food, gifts, clothes, photography, or public status.

A sangh should ideally support tapasvis in a way that is:

• simple,
• humble,
• affordable,
• non-competitive,
• and spiritually focused.

No family should feel that Dharma requires spending lakhs to maintain respect.

Logical Explanation

The social norm continues because of a mix of reasons:

• Fundraising: Mandirs, sanghs, pathshalas, and events need money.
• Tradition: People continue what previous generations did.
• Community honor: Families feel proud to participate publicly.
• Social expectation: Over time, devotion gets mixed with status.
• Fear of judgment: People worry what society will say if they keep it simple.

So logically, the original purpose may have been religious support and community participation. But socially, it can become distorted into prestige and competition.

That distortion is what you are reacting to.

Spiritual Understanding

Jain Dharma is not against celebration. But Jain celebration should be filled with:

• bhakti,
• simplicity,
• humility,
• dān without ego,
• and inspiration toward self-restraint.

If a person gives a large donation silently and humbly, that is noble. If a person gives to gain status and superiority, that becomes spiritually dangerous.

Likewise, if a community honors a tapasvi to inspire others, that is good. If the function becomes a burden, competition, or status show, it loses spiritual purity.

Takeaway

Your frustration is not anti-Jain. In fact, your concern comes from sensing that the essence of Jain Dharma is simplicity, humility, self-control, and inner purity.

A balanced Jain view would be:

• Bidding or celebrations may be acceptable when done with humility, transparency, and Dharma-bhāv.
• They become problematic when they create ego, financial pressure, social hierarchy, or display.
• Tapasya never requires a grand function.
• A simple religious life with pure intention is always better than grand display with pride.

The real Jain question is not: “How grand was the function?”

The real Jain question is: “Did this reduce attachment, ego, and passions — or increase them?”