Short answer

• It depends on the maryada (discipline) of the sampradāy and the guidance of the present Āchārya/Guruvarga.
• Among Śvetāmbara non‑image‑worshipping traditions (Sthānakvāsī/Terāpanth), many follow a gentler view: rajaswalā (menstruation) is a natural, bodily process, not a moral impurity. So strict household taboos are often reduced, and sādhu-sādhvijīs do not interrogate donors about it.
• In several other Jain traditions, laywomen still keep classic rajaswalā-niyams (e.g., avoiding pūjā and not personally cooking/serving for monks/nuns for 3 days). Both positions exist in Jain Dharma today.

About “sādhvijī taking food from rajaswalā women”

• The common, careful practice across many groups is: the menstruating woman herself refrains from cooking/serving for sādhus/sādhvīs during those days; another family member offers gochari.
• In some Sthānakvāsī/Terāpanth lineages, sādhvijīs do not ask personal, bodily-status questions and may accept alms from the household if the offering is otherwise within maryada. The responsibility (apramatta—carefulness) lies with the householder to follow her own niyam; sādhvijīs avoid creating embarrassment or himsā of speech by probing.

Why the difference?

• Core Jain principle: inner purity (bhāva-śuddhi) matters more than notions of “touch” impurity. Menstruation is biological; pāp arises from kashāyas (anger, pride, deceit, greed), not from a natural cycle.
• At the same time, Jain āchār-granths also teach discipline and care in religious acts. Hence some traditions retain certain restraints for those specific days, mainly around ritual acts and personal serving of food to ascetics.
• Because both concerns are valid, different sampradāys have different maryadās laid down by their Āchāryas.

What you can do

• Follow the clear guidance of your own Āchārya/Guruvarga. Do not argue with neighbours; respect their maryada, keep yours.
• If you keep rajaswalā-niyam: simply let another family member prepare/offer gochari on those days, and you continue your sāmāyik, japa, and svādhyāy mentally without external pūjā.
• If your sampradāy teaches no special taboo: maintain śuddhi, ahiṁsā, and apramatta in mind–speech–body, and avoid stigma or shame toward anyone.

Note

• Practices genuinely vary between Digambar and Śvetāmbara, and even within gacchas/gaṇs. The deciding authority is your present Āchārya’s maryadā.