In Jain Dharma, any sexual activity done only for pleasure, outside of marriage, is called abrahma (opposite of brahmacharya). This is a paap (sinful karma), but it can be purified through true prayashchit (repentance + change).

Below is a simple, practical Jain way:

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1. Accept clearly: “Yes, I did abrahma”

• Do not justify it: “Everyone does it”, “We love each other”, etc.
• In your heart say very honestly:

- “I have misused my body and senses.” - “I have increased my passions (kashayas).”

• This clear acceptance is the first step of pashchātāp (remorse).

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2. Alochana – confess your fault

If possible:

• In front of a Guru / sadhu / sadhvi / Jain scholar you trust:

- Briefly say what kind of mistake it was (no need for dirty details). - With humility, ask for guidance and prayashchit.

If you have no access to Guru:

• Sit alone in front of Dev–Guru–Dharma photo or idol.
• Fold hands, bow your head, and say (in your own language), for example:

- “I confess my faults of sexual misconduct. I did … (mentally recall). I feel true regret. I don’t want to repeat this again. Please give me strength to follow brahmacharya according to my stage of life.”

This mental confession is also alochana.

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3. Pratikraman – ask forgiveness and clean the karma

Both Śvetāmbara and Digambara traditions teach:

• Alochana – Pratikraman – Pratyakhyan – Prayaschit

If you can, start doing daily or at least fortnightly Pratikraman (Samvatsari style once a year is minimum, but for such faults, sooner is better).

If you don’t know full Pratikraman, do a simple form every night:

1. Sit quietly, remember that act of sexual intimacy.
2. Feel real pain inside: “I have harmed my own soul.”
3. Say with true feeling:

- “Michchhāmi dukkaḍaṁ” – “May all my faults become fruitless.”

1. Ask forgiveness from:

- The person involved - All beings you may have hurt (emotionally, physically, or through related acts like lies, cheating, abortion, etc.)

1. Mentally bow to all the Panch Parmesthi.

Even simple, sincere nightly pratikraman reduces that karma.

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4. Pratyakhyan – strong decision not to repeat

Prayashchit is incomplete without a new vow.

Make a clear and practical niyamit sankalp according to your present life-stage:

If you are unmarried

Take a vow like:

• “From today, I will not have any sexual touch or intimacy with anyone.”
• “I will avoid pornography, erotic chatting, and self-stimulation (masturbation) as far as I can.”
• “If thoughts come, I will not enjoy them; I will change my focus, repeat Navkar Mantra.”

If you are married (or will marry later)

• Keep sexual relation only with spouse, and even there with restraint and responsibility, not as blind lust.
• No physical intimacy with anyone else, even if there is attraction.

You can strengthen this by:

• Saying your sankalp in front of Dev–Guru.
• Writing it on paper and keeping it in your Pooja room.

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5. Do some specific prayashchit–taps (atonement practices)

According to your capacity, you can adopt:

• Upvas / Ekasana / Beasana (fasting or eating once/twice with discipline)
• Japa of Navkar Mantra (e.g., 108 times daily with special bhav of cleansing abrahma karma)
• Swadhyaya – read / listen about brahmacharya and sanyam
• Seva of sadhus / sadhvis / Jain temple as vinay (humility) and punya

Do not overdo suddenly; choose small but steady prayashchit you can actually continue.

You can read more on this related topic here

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6. Correct any hurt you have caused (without creating new sin)

Ask yourself calmly:

• Did I emotionally use someone only for pleasure?
• Did I pressure or manipulate them?
• Did I lie, cheat, or break someone’s trust?
• Was there any abortion, or risk of disease, or social harm?

If possible without creating new complications:

• Speak honestly.
• Apologize for any emotional misuse or cheating.
• Stop any ongoing sinful physical relation.

But do this wisely:

• Jain Dharma does not ask you to create new lies, new attachments, or new fights in the name of correction.
• Where direct talk will cause big damage or more passions (anger, hate, revenge), do inner pratikraman and keep distance in practice.

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7. Live more like a brahmachari from now

To prevent repetition:

• Control what you see and hear:

- Avoid erotic movies, series, social media, songs.

• Avoid wrong company:

- Friends who always talk sexual, send vulgar content, encourage casual relationships.

• Food & routine:

- Very spicy, heavy, stimulating food, late nights, idleness – all increase passion. - Prefer simple, saatvik food and disciplined sleep.

• Fill life with Dharma:

- Navkar mantra, pooja, swadhyaya, satsang. - Good hobbies, meaningful work/study, seva.

The more your mind is positively engaged, the less space there is for lust.

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8. Do not hate yourself; hate the fault, not the soul

Jain view:

• Your soul is eternally pure in its real nature.
• Abrahma is a temporary impurity (karma), which can be removed with:

- samyak darshan (right faith), - samyak gyan (right knowledge), - samyak charitra (right conduct).

So:

• Feel deep regret – this burns karma.
• But do not fall into depression or self-hatred.
• Tell yourself:

- “I made a mistake. Now I am correcting it with Jain Dharma. From today, I walk towards brahmacharya and inner purity.”

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Difference between Śvetāmbara & Digambara (brief)

• Both agree:

- Abrahma = paap. - Brahmacharya is essential for spiritual progress. - Alochana–Pratikraman–Pratyakhyan–Prayashchit are the way to clean such faults.

• Differences are in:

- Exact rituals, sutras, and daily procedure of Pratikraman. - But the principle of honest confession, repentance, vow, and self-control is same.

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If you truly feel regret, confess sincerely, take a clear vow, and walk towards brahmacharya day by day, then according to Jain Dharma, your past sexual sin does not have to define your future. Through right effort, that karma can be weakened and shed.