In Jain Dharam, a grihastha (householder) follows brahmacharya anuvrat: contentment with one’s own spouse (swadara-santosh) and restraint over sensuality.

• Within marriage, gentle physical care with your wife’s clear consent and without harm is permissible.
• Keep maryada (modesty) and ahimsa in mind. If the intent is care/comfort (e.g., pain relief), it is acceptable.
• Avoid indulgence, excitation of passions, or anything obscene; Jain texts class these as atichar (slips) of brahmacharya.
• Practice restraint; even with one’s spouse, excess is discouraged. If you feel you crossed limits, do pratikraman and renew your vow of self-control.

For simple explanations of these vows:

• Twelve vows of laypeople and brahmacharya anuvrat
• Swadara-santosh (contentment with one’s spouse) and maithun-viraman (restraint)
• Atichar (minor transgressions) of brahmacharya to avoid